I met Pearl Mattenson when we both wrote for (now defunct) Carrie + Danielle. Though we still haven’t met “in person,” we’ve been internet buddies ever since. When I saw her profiled on Fear.Less (go read it, it’s awesome) recently, I had to drop her a congratulatory note. We got to chatting and turns out we were both working on book projects.
Pearl is a leadership and relationship coach, with all this training and years of experience, so I was waiting with bated breath to see what she’d think of my book, which is a lot more about relationships than it is about tulle and bows. Just the other day, she posted this on Amazon:
A “meaningful” gift to couples… [5 stars]
Suzyn is a talented writer with a down home sense of humor so I knew I would laugh. (I did). I also knew she was wise beyond her years and I would learn from this book. (I did). What I had not realized is that even without the years of training I have put in, she gets relationships and how to create meaning- in her bones. What I love about this book is that it gets at the core of what is important.
Suzyn gets right to the point- It is not about the magazine driven mayhem that wedding planning has become. It is about you and your partner. It is about building a life and setting the tone for how that life together will begin. The book is content rich AND a workbook. And because the questions Suzyn asks are so fundamental and important- it is more than a workbook. It becomes a repository for your (you & your partner’s) most heartfelt dreams and closely held values.
The beautiful cover ensures this will be a keepsake that stays with the wedding album and will be pored over for years to come.
I think I’ve read this 50 times since she posted it – I’m completely blown away and so so honored!
Stay tuned for my review of Pearl’s book, Conversations for Making Moments Matter. It’s fantastic.
I launched my book two days ago, March 8. Over the past two days, I’ve posted here, I’ve tweeted, and most importantly I’ve emailed just about everyone I know (if you know me and you didn’t get an email, it’s because I have an old email address for you!) And, voila: I’m in the top 100 wedding planning books on Amazon.com!!!
But the best part by far is all the wonderful notes I’ve been getting. I am really fortunate to know a large number of lovely people. My heart is filled with thanks today.
Update: Later in the day, I hit #19!
I am beyond thrilled to be able to say:
Going Home Married: How to Plan a Meaningful Wedding Without Losing Your Mind
(Isn’t it beautiful?)
The gist: The aesthetics of your wedding should support your relationship, and not the other way around. Figure out what getting married means to you, build a ceremony around that, and then build an event around the ceremony. Simple.
Here’s what people are saying about it:
Your writing style is so open and direct, it’s a breath of fresh and inspiring air! Clearly says to readers “you can do this and have a great time doing it.” –Bryan Smith
I LOVE the short lists of simple things. I love the slashing through the extras to get to the essential. It’s like spring cleaning. I think this will appeal to the sorts of people who want permission to do something individual and personal (perhaps unconventional) instead of prescribed. –Kirsten Hall
The realization that one needs to think critically about the so-called wisdom and utility of most wedding books is a true gift. Plus, your book is genuinely funny—it will get people laughing while they plan their weddings. –Caitlin Craven
Intrigued? You can download a sample chapter here.
Sold? Buy it, please! (It’s only $10.)
I need your help.
Here’s the thing: There’s no such thing as a giant, anonymous “book buying public.” No “media machine.” There are only people, like you and me, talking to each other. So please, if you believe in this book and its message (or, if you just like me) talk about it. Tweet it. Post it. Email the preview chapter to all your friends. Give the book as an engagement gift. Post a review on amazon (hugely helpful). Mention it to your neighbor.
I truly believe this book will help people. But before it can help people, they need to hear about it.
Thank you thank you thank you.
One more thing.
I’m setting up a blog tour. My goal is 31 blogs for the 31 days of May. Reviews, guest posts, interviews, excerpts, contests… If you would like to be involved, please let me know.
Thank you. So many people have supported and encouraged me in this project. I feel lucky to have such wonderful people in my corner.
My proof copy arrived over the weekend.
It’s real. It’s here. It’s a book! My hands shook as I held it.
Then, as you can see, I read it cover to cover and filled it with post-it notes (pink ones, natch!) with tweaks, nits, teensy changes. It’s almost there. It’s almost ready to share with the world.
So in honor of my proof, of my almost-there-ness, of my shaking hands… I’d like to share with you my favorite paragraph from the whole book. This is from the end of the chapter on clothes.
Ultimately, this day is about you, not about your dress or your tie or your shoes. The clothes you wear are simply the packaging that allows you to be the very best you on this day. Think about who you are, at this moment, at your age, embarking on this great adventure. You do not have to be the best you that ever was or ever will be, simply the best you right now. How did you get to this point in your life? Where are you going from here? Obviously you’re pretty wonderful—after all, someone wants to partner with you for life! Show yourself off. Not your body or your earrings—your self. The inner light that makes you unique. Keep the outfit simple, and concentrate on being calm, centered, and present. The glow that will bathe you when you let yourself feel all the feelings of the day will be more gorgeous than any lace, crystal, satin, or hipster cummerbund.
What did you wear/are you planning to wear to your wedding? Were you comfy? Did you look fabulous? Do you think it’s possible to achieve both in one outfit? Please leave a note!
Want to read more of my book? Jump on my mailing list to get a free sample chapter (and be the first to know when it goes on sale!)
My first ever published knitting pattern wasn’t really a pattern. There was no specified yarn, no gauge, no sizes. The idea wasn’t to look at my sample and perfectly recreate it. Instead, I offered a (bewildering, to most) set of formulas (formulae?) that, if you plugged in your own gauge (with your favorite yarn) and your own measurements, would produce a t-shirt that fit YOU. There’s no way knitty would publish it now (and I’m so grateful that they did, back in the Wild Wild West days of no set sizes!)
A few brave souls plugged in their data and… it worked! They added stripes, they added cables – one lady even told me that my formulas were helpful when she was learning to design her own sweater patterns. This made me very very happy. Here, if you’re on Ravelry, you can see everyone’s projects.
Now, skip ahead to a little over a year ago, when I posted my most outrageously successful* knitting patterns. They’re not really patterns, either. Again, you use your own yarn, your own gauge, your own head size (or that of someone you love), and voila! A hat that fits. I think I improved on the T-shirt concept in that there are no formulas to fill out (hence the “no math” thing).
People have done all sorts of interesting things with them – I mean check out the creativity! (again, those are Ravelry links) I get comments like “I love this pattern! It is a little free-wheeling, but a great way to use up yarn.” This makes me very very happy.
Soooo (getting to the point at last) if you’re wondering (as I do at times) how someone goes from writing about knitting and designing knitting patterns to writing a book about weddings – well, there is a through line!
The book works the same way as the not-really-patterns. There’s a lot of fill-in-the-blanks, a lot of “what would YOU like?” It’s not a step-by-step guide for how to replicate something I’ve already imagined, but an invitation to put your own mark on your creation.
It is my fervent hope that the weddings that spring from this book are as varied, as unique, and as charming as all those hats and t-shirts. That would make me very very happy. (And that’s what it’s all about, right?)
* by “outrageously successful,” I mean triple-digit loves and double-digit projects on Ravelry!
Do you write a blog about weddings, or relationships, or style, or creativity, or—you know, life? Do you know someone who does? Then I want to talk to you.
I’m setting up a blog tour to get the word out about my new book. I’m planning interviews, guest posts, freebie copies for contests… I can’t wait to share Going Home Married with the world!
I’m firstname.lastname@example.org, and I’d love to hear from you!